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bye-bye, Joy

I decided that I am no longer going to use the nickname “Joy” as I feel like there’s no point in hiding who I am. Most people who visit this blog know me from my tumblr account @blackpink anyway. I now go by Suzy, my actual name.

My affiliates do not have to change the name, but it would be appreciated – even though I doubt that any of you are still visiting my blog since I’ve been kind of MIA the past few months. I should visit everyone’s blogs later today to show you guys that I’m still alive and well.

So what has happened? I’m currently still on winter break from uni and I’ve been trying desperately to get an internship. So far I have had one interview and I’m invited to another one next week. Hopefully the other companies I applied to will get back to me soon, too.

My love life is non-existent. It’s fine, though. I’ve been taking a break from flirting and getting to know new people since I am sick of boy-drama ATM. Honestly, men are exhausting and I’m doing pretty well with not having to worry about this sort of stuff right now.

The past few weeks I have lost and gained weight. I stopped counting calories for two weeks and I ended up binge-eating every. single. day. – I started to count again yesterday. It makes me feel safe and ensures that I don’t eat enormous amounts of food. Love this.

I know I always say this but I will try to write in as often as I can, just because I always feel better after writing down my feelings etc and I feel like I haven’t shared any personal things lately.

2018 already, huh?

A lot happened the past few months and I can confidently say that I grew a lot as a person. I think it’s important to always work on yourself even though sometimes I do feel a bit hypocritical for saying that. After all there are some demons I can’t deal with yet.

This year I want to learn to love myself even more. I think I’m already pretty happy with my personality but I need to work on loving my body more. As you may or may not know I am struggling with a Binge Eating Disorder which has been tough. Even now as I am typing this I am trying to refrain myself from going to the grocery store and buying a ton of junk. I really want to start this summer not hating to look into the mirror and feeling insecure about my body.

I am going to make a more detailed post about everything that has happened as soon as I’m done with my exams.

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